Monday Morning Links: Hangover Edition

// February 8th, 2010 // No Comments » // Minnesota, Uncategorized

No, I’m not hung over (me…well, I never touch the stuff) but I’ll tell you who is:  Colts fans.  And who isn’t, Bills Fans, cause come playoff time we have nothing to do. Sure I watched the game yesterday, but I’ll leave the analysis to the guys over at FWG-NFL. But since football season is now officially over, here’s some links to get you through your day.

Super Bowl Commercials really didn’t do it for me.  You can find the complete compilation of them here.  My knee jerk reaction? There was a lot of man-meat on the screen all night.

No homo.

Troy Polamalu, with all that beautiful hair had one of the best of the day.  Side note:  That is his most manageable size.

Morning Links: Tebow Cant Throw…PERIOD, Morning Miracles in Central New York, and I’ve Hired an Intern

// February 5th, 2010 // No Comments » // Uncategorized

• All of this “Tebow in the NFL” talk has led me to the conclusion that people aren’t too sure if he can make it.  Judging by the above picture, his side-arm delivery is rock solid and ready to take the NFL by storm (of locusts).  There has been some talk about him heading the Jags, which apparently is not sitting well with Uche Nwaneri, who got on the Jags fan board and gave his own Top 5 of why Tebow sucks.  Reason #1… “He can’t throw….PERIOD!”  read the other 4 reasons here. [YahooSports]
  
• Speaking of Tebow, here’s your morning miracle: 31 players signed on to play Syracuse Football. Now do you believe in the impossible?   Oh and here’s one of the little whipper-snappers now.  With his helmet of hair and athletic body, he’s already two steps ahead of me career wise.

• In more FWG news, after an extensive search, we’ve hired an intern.  You won’t see him, cause he’ll be behind the scenes, getting my coffee, folding my clothes and making my dinner.  I tried to warn him “this will be nothing but a blemish on your resume”  But, he seems to think we’re doing something right here.  And I can’t disagree with him 22 intern applicants and 1,000,000 readers can’t be wrong.  Then again, they probably could.

CBS Sports Writer Gregg Doyel Won’t Call Kyle Eckel a Traitor, Low Life, Or Scumbag (he’ll just juxtapose and insinuate it.)

// February 3rd, 2010 // No Comments » // Uncategorized

Kyle Eckel left Navy in Spring 2005.  You can read the article for the details on how that worked out, but basically this “sports writer” has no concrete facts, or evidence of foul play, and plays the “I just can’t do it” card (seriously, read the article you’ll understand).   Classic case of guilty until proven innocent.  Or, in this case you have Eckel, who was actually found innocent, and now made guilty by irresponsible journalism.

I’ll let you decide for yourself. But it is a dangerous path when a reporter can’t get a quote from a guy, so he starts juxtaposing words like “traitor” and “dismissed from the Navy” without solid facts or even a detailed report of what happened.  Throw in a few mentionings of crimes/incidents which Kyle Eckel was found innocent of or the chargers were dropped, and you’ve pretty much made him out to be a scum bag traitor, which, ladies and gentleman, I don’t believe he is.  Instead of focusing on how the kid from NAVY made it to the NFL, and now the Super Bowl, Gregg Doyel would rather have you thinking he should be side stepping IED’s instead of linebackers.

National Signing Day: The Last Day These Guys (recruits) Will Ever Be In The Drivers Seat…ever. ever ever.

// February 3rd, 2010 // 1 Comment » // Uncategorized

I remember way back when I inked my then unpracticed, untested signature on the dotted line, thus evaporating the very notion of being “wanted” or “pursued”.  The weeks before I ended up signing with UConn were like a new relationship; Fresh, interesting and plenty of sexting (there really is nothing like new love.)  My official visit was full of lobster and steak, and (if you can believe it) Head Coach Randy Edsall serving me hot butter.  The day after signing, and the following 5 season were more like “the morning after”….little regret, a hot shower, and some soul searching.  I enjoyed every minute at UConn, but you can bet your sweet ass I was serving my own butter once I was on campus.  Delicious, delicious, self-served butter. Hmmmm.  Memories.

That being said, I’m going to defer to my friends over at Every Day Should Be Saturday, who came in with this quote:

Honda, purchased: Just a reminder: when this is all over, the same coaches buttering recruits up will be the ones running them until they vomit, screaming at them in the weight room, and later possibly making taunts involving their dead or incarcerated  relatives. To be fair, though, the “sold a Rolls Royce and given a Honda” metaphor mentioned here in the Post is a bit inaccurate since Maryland isn’t even a Honda. Hondas, unlike Maryland football, are reliable and steady, whereas the Terrapins under Friedgen have been Chryslers at best.

Or, maybe even gas-pedal-malfunctioning Toyotas.  How topical of me.

Lost Premiere Tonight! The Final Season….and nothing to do with football

// February 2nd, 2010 // No Comments » // Uncategorized

I haven’t missed an episode of Lost since it began.  Not one.  And tonight is the premiere of the new (and final) season.  I can only imagine that all those hours glued to the TV will pay off with every question and mystery getting uniformly resolved.  I know college hoops is up and running, but college football is done, signing day isn’t til Wednesday so why don’t you go treat yourself to some Jack, Sawyer, and Kate….one me.

Final Thoughts:
My girlfriend said she wanted to start watching.  We got one episode in and she goes, “I don’t get it.  Why don’t they just hang out on the beach all day, that’s what I’d do”   On some level I was almost dumbfounded, as any fan of ABC’s Lost would be, “Hang out? Hang out?!? But there is hatches, and codes, and a fucking polar bear mystery to be solved!”  But then I realized, holy shit, why the hell don’t they just hang out on the beach?

Morning Football Links: National Signing Day, Morning Erections, Unicorn Horns, and The Downfall Of Barack Obama

// February 2nd, 2010 // No Comments » // Justice, Uconn, Uncategorized, wob

• Morning erection….of a statue of Nick Saban.  Nothing can get Saban (’s statue) erect like Al Moore [Tide Sports]

• Unicorn Horns.  Arbitrary and about as accurate as the “star system”  Ride into the rainbow. [NESN]

• National Signing Day is tomorrow, and there a are still few “five stars” who are undecided.  like Seantrel Henderson, who is likely going to Ohio State, but won’t let anyone in on the secret [Twin Cities]

• B.J. Daniels is getting his shoulder operated on.  Things are currently the definition of “a mess” in South Florida [TampaBay.com]

• Health care debate?  What health care debate?  Obama is pondering the legality of the BCS.  God Bless the USA! [Dallas News]

2010 Senior Bowl Players To Watch (Yes Tim Tebow Is On There)

// January 29th, 2010 // No Comments » // Justice, Minnesota, Rob Lunn, Uncategorized

You should watch this year’s senior bowl for several reasons.  Not only is it a precursor to the combine and draft, but it is also infinitely more entertaining than the Pro Bowl.  Sure, its an All Star game, but these guys actually have something to prove, which makes them very dangerous people.  So here are my players to watch.

QB - Tim Tebow, Florida Gators - Tebow is probably the prospect that everyone is watching. He had an outstanding career at Florida but has a ton of questions to answer as an NFL prospect. Can he play under center? (probably  not) Can he make drop backs second nature? Can he fix his extremely long release? (that’s what she said)

WR - Danario Alexander, Missouri Tigers - Great Size (6′5, 221 lbs.) Went under the radar at Missouri. His speed is the big question mark. There are a lot of good receivers in this draft but many are small guys with blazing speed. He is a different type of WR.

RB/WR - Dexter McCluster, Ole Miss Rebels - Kid can fly. I mean not literally, but pretty close. Many people will question his size (5′8, 165 lbs.) but the NFL is built for speed, not comfort (like Dr. Quinn’s boobs)  Current examples in the NFL include DeSean Jackson, Darren Sproles, and Percy Harvin.  His stock is sky rocketing and I’m going on the record saying he’ll be a 2^nd round pick.

DT - Terrence Cody, Alabama Crimson Tide - I just wrote him in because rarely do you get to watch guys close to 400 lbs play football. He weighed in at 370 lbs. An absolute monster in the middle. Cody says he will drop 20 lbs. before the combine but for how big he is, he is athletic and can move. He clogs up the middle and will allow LBs to run free through holes to make stops in the back field.

S - Taylor Mays, USC Trojans - At 6′3, 231 lbs, Taylor Mays is like a LB playing safety. He is an absolute freak athlete. He runs very well and is a student of the game. He struggles in the play action passing game and some scouts question his football instincts. He had a down year at USC and it will hurt his draft stock a little. Sometimes Mays takes bad angles to the ball. There has been talk that Mays will move to LB in the NFL.

January 29th, The Birthday Of Champions and Fat Kids

// January 29th, 2010 // No Comments » // Uncategorized

Today is my birthday, it is also Ians @ SoxAndDawgs.com

It also happens to be Tom Selleck’s birthday, which is ironic considering this piece I did on him last year.  Anyway,I usually celebrate my birthday by dreading Winter Workouts.  But today, I woke up, ate brownies and ice cream, and did the naked dance for my girlfriend.  All was well, and then I saw this video, which makes me regret joking about how delicious brownies are for breakfast.

Why I hate The Pro Bowl….And You Should Too

// January 28th, 2010 // No Comments » // Uncategorized

If you haven’t noticed, we’ve moved all NFL Talk over to the new site: FWGNFL.com  and today, they have a post of the same name.   But here on Thoughts From a Fat White Guy I’m taking the same title, different direction.  You can find out why Jay and the crew hate the Pro Bowl by clicking here, but as for me.  Here’s why I hate the Pro Bowl.

Unlike the All Star break in MLB, where the game is a time welcomed by players to regroup and recover, and by fans that can break up the monotony of the summer stretch, the NFL’s Pro Bowl is stuck at the end of the season (or at least it was) in a time when no one really cares.  Before this year it was after the biggest night in sports, when it was about as relevant as, oh I don’t know, this blog.  Which for those of you keeping score at home, is somewhere between Division 3 women’s basketball and my entire football career.  Anyway, the players didn’t care, and either did the fans.  All we knew was that it was in Hawaii, it helped tourism there, and there was alot of flowery shirts on the sidelines.

This year, they’ve moved the game to Florida, put it before the Super Bowl and exempted all the players that are playing in the big game.  Not to mention that 5 of the 6 QBs selected won’t be there, and we can watch the likes of David Garrard sling it.  I won’t even go on the moral tangent and how this hurts tourism in Hawaii, but, well,  it does.  Being selected to the Pro Bowl is an honor, but it better serves players in contract negotiations that it does draw fans to yet another NFL weekend.  You can’t suit up for an extra game, at the end of the season without it taxing the body.  Not to mention the rules on blitzing and all the crap, which makes the game about as much fun as watching paint dry. My vote is to make the Pro Bowl a fictional team, you know like the all decade or all century squads we see.  Its an honor to be selected, to be considered the best, and that’s the end of it, problem solved.  The issue is, that football unlike the other major sports, only plays a handful games.

Well, I’ve Been Out Done….Well Played Terrence Cody

// January 26th, 2010 // 2 Comments » // Uncategorized

When I went to upload this picture, it gave me options, Small.  Medium. or “Full Sized” .  Well, Terrence Cody just weighed in at 370lbs for the Senior Bowl.  This heart attack  waiting to happen is fast approaching 4 bills.  God Bless him, and the quarter pounder he road in on.
Anyone else think he kinda looks like the black “Lost Boy” from Hook?

UPDATE….

Holy Shit. There is a blog dedicated to this kid:  www.TheFatKidFromHook.blogspot.com