Rutgers Week (Tony Soprano Rejoices!)

// October 13th, 2008 // Uncategorized

It’s back to college football. No more Martha Stewart, no more apple picking, no more Fall-Foliage-Popped-Collar-Fun (at least until next bye week). This week it’s back to grunting and sweating and watching film. This week we continue our Big East play; this week we play Rutgers.

This post is all Rutgers, making it all-Jersey. Meaning, pick one of these to play while reading.
Bon Jovi: Or The Boss:

The apparent birthplace of the prolate-spheroid (also the IROC Camero and Bon Jovi) is where we will find ourselves this Saturday. That’s right, the Garden State (if you’re growing smokestacks), the pride of New Jersey (sorry Bada-Bing), Rutgers University.

This week is going to provide a lot of tests for us, but before I get into that I want to breakdown a few things about Rutgers that the national media seems to be missing.

This is a team coached by Greg Schiano (of keep choppin’ fame). The past two seasons, he has done an excellent job of instilling a sense of unquestionable pride in his players regarding Rutgers football. Yet with only one win under his belt in 2008, the townsfolk are grabbing their pitchforks and torches (or is it hair gel and glowsticks?…ohhh), calling for his head. It is a testament to how fickle the mob can be (thanks Gladiator). A year ago Rutgers entered the season in the Top 25, the “experts” talking about this program having a permanent spot in the big time. But why is all this important? Because this is a team coached by Greg Schiano, with unquestionable pride. No team gives up mid-season. Especially his players– they certainly go into every game thinking they are going to win, and more importantly, preparing relentlessly to win. So I now issue a memo to all of the college football commentators: stating the obvious is not keen research or insight. Yes, their record is poor, especially compared to recent success. No, this game should not be taken lightly. Every game is a battle, especially in the “Black and Blue League,” so tune in, don’t tune out. This is the Big East, every game can change the season.

Rutgers Offense:
Mike Teel has the rare quality of being able to get hot, even when the game seems to be on ice. A good leader, fifth year senior who has a strong, accurate arm. He’s also got some serious targets down field (enter Kenny Britt). Ken (insert Barbie joke) is a receiver with big play capability that can catch the under ball and take it long and the long ball (and…uh…take it longer?).
They are definitely hurting by not having Ray Rice, but that doesn’t take away anything from their current backs, but any college program from Texas to Towson would have trouble filling the shoes of a recordbreaking, NFL-caliber back like Ray-Ray.
I have to give a shout to the Big-Uglies. Their starting left tackle, Anthony Davis, is legit. He’s moved from guard (where I faced him last year), to fill the (big) shoes of now NFL O-linemen Pedro Sosa (who I want to call Pedro Sorano, remember Major League?). Anyway, on film Davis is mobile, with good feet, and a penchant for finishing off defenseless D-Linemen (like any good OT is taught). Get your minds right, Cody and Julius.

Rutgers Defense:
Their secondary is the strength of their team. They can all play man coverage as well as the zone and their closing speed is tremendous. I can personally attest to the athleticism of Courtney Greene; I played with him in the NY v. NJ All-Star Game (of course New York won). He was originally committed to ‘Cuse, but the college football gods work in mysterious ways, and bada-bing-bada-boop he’s in Piscataway making plays and climbing up draft boards.
Their defensive line, if we were to compare it to another, would most closely resemble UConn’s (minus the slow-fat-unathletic type). They are smaller, faster, and more agile than your typical defensive line.

Expect the game in the trenches to be a slug fest.

So now back to UConn.

24-hour rule in full effect, we analyzed, addressed, and corrected the mistakes we made in the UNC game. Did it hurt? Sure it did (you cut me deep Cameron Sexton, cut me deep). But it’s over, and we are focused on the Big East now, specifically our blow-out-friendly neighbors, Rutgers. (Rutgers/NJ jokes wearing thin? Too bad.)

Expect Zach Frazer to come out gun slinging. The kid is a focused competitor with a short memory. His most telling accolade though? Recipient of the Lunn-Sung Hero Award. He’s now famous.

Defensive line is back at full strength. And in later news, at about 1:00 yesterday afternoon, I caught my reflection in the mirror. I paused to enjoy the view (drink it in, ladies). There, amongst my flab I saw an “ab,” in the upper right corner of what was once the six-pack area… only for a moment, then he went back into hibernation. But I know he’s there. (I’ll see you in the spring, sucker!).

Some Final Thoughts:

There has been some speculation that (former defensive tackle turned Indianapolis Colt) Dan Davis is faster than me. Dear Dan, You are not. I still love you, -FWG

I met Ray Rice’s uncle this summer in New Rochelle. Couldn’t have been a bigger fan of college football and all things Ray Rice. I’d like to make some remarks about how his unabashed fanhood for his nephew was embarrassing. However, my mother’s dance moves are shown on the Jumbo-tron at games, proudly wearing her (custom made) Lunn-65 shirt. So, on this, you get a pass, sir.

Ever been to Pandora.com? I’ll skip explaining how that works, but do yourself a favor and go ahead and create “Pat Benatar Radio.” You’ll thank me later.

The Red Sox. Oh the Red Sox.

I saw “Body of Lies” last night. Might as well have been called “Body of Awesome.” Crowe, DiCaprio? Gladiator and Titanic? Ridley Scott directs? Lock of the century. Go see it now.

Just how many New Jersey digs were there in this post? Seven. Am I sorry? Sort of. Having dated a few Jersey girls (never again), there are some things I love from NJ. To name a few; Italian delis, the shore, and Pork Roll (Taylor Ham).
Processed pork product, best served fried…with cheese? Being fat, the best thing ever. So tasty. I can’t describe it; run (don’t walk) to get one. Too fat to run? Walk speedily, you’ll never view breakfast sandwiches the same.

Get back to you later this week,
(keep the e-mails comin!)
-FWG-

10 Responses to “Rutgers Week (Tony Soprano Rejoices!)”

  1. bulldogxxi says:

    It is very bad to steal Jobu’s rum

  2. JBurd says:

    You got it dead on with the Taylor Ham. One of my college roommates ate that stuff religiously, needless to say he was also a FWG. Is it so delicious that New Jerseyians sp? do not want to share it with the other states?

  3. Mark Lynch says:

    As a former QB now a FWG (should read Old FWG)…this blog is hilarious. Hope you get the ESPN recognition, pretty funny stuff! Thanks for the link to Pandora.com…keep it up and good luck this weekend against Bada Bing boys!

  4. HuskyDad65 says:

    well done Rob……and now you can admit that you thought it was a waste of time with all those creative writing assignments you were given in high school. But truthfully, you have a sense of humor and writing style that could only have come from your Uncle Junior ……

  5. John says:

    logged at nj dot com slash rutgersfootball … I admit, you are dead on about pork roll, but you spelled Camaro wrong. See you Saturday.

  6. JBurd says:

    Word on the Boneyard is that you took a job with NESN for next year. Grats Rob!

  7. futureuconndad says:

    Excellent! Have been enjoying FWG the past week. Big fun. Keep up the good work…sure breaks up the monotony of lengthy conference calls. Insight coupled with whit is a unique combo!

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