Back in Upstate for the Turkey Break…
// November 26th, 2008 // Uncategorized
(yes, channeling my inner Keith Richards–FWG goes heroin-chic)
I met up with a bunch of my high school buddies and we had a few beers (only water for the FWG…I swear) and it’s refreshing to know that no matter how big my head gets (it’s tough being a blogger) nothing is off limits to my friends.
Top comments for the night: “Jesus, Rob! You’re bald!” (thanks, Tim) “…you look less fat than the last time I saw you.” But I wish everyone could have those “keep you grounded” moments.
The other part about being home is that my friends are no longer in college (apparently the 5-year plan has eluded them), which is a painful, if not all too real reminder that my college days (college football days) are rapidly coming to an end. The FWG will save all his sappy college memoirs for a later post, but it’s a reminder to keep livin’ this dream ’til it’s done.
Alright enough of this before I get all choked up.
Some Final Thoughts:
I hate to write an FWG disseration on individuals who dramatically use the word “DAMN” but I’m going to. So here is my open letter to these people:
Dear purveyors of the pseudo-urban vernacular: Please refrain from ever using the word “DAMN” in my presence to exclaim shock or amazement. (”Damn! Thats a huge cucumber.”) Enough is enough. Even worse still, when you decide to up the syllable ante, thereby taking “damn” and bastardizing it into “DAYYYYUMMMMM.” It makes you neither more intelligent nor trendy. In fact, recent studies have shown that “DAYUMM” didn’t even have its fifteen minutes of fame, but rather entered into the general speech like a wayward gene mutating an entire gene pool. If the rules of Darwinism have taught us anything, it’s time for “DAYUMM” to go the way of the Apodiformes (perhaps you’re more comfortable with a Dodo analogy?). Extinct birds aside, take this letter as a warning that the backside of my hand and further blog bashing awaits any and all who use this word incorrectly in their daily speech.
(I will now get off my soap box, and return to eating my emotions.)
I got sucked into watching Dancing with the Stars tonight. Didn’t hate it. However, I can’t tell whether I was more impressed with Warren Sapp’s dance moves or his outfit (Ruffles? Really, Warren?). I imagine the attraction to watching this is the same reason people go see the leaning tower of Pisa: Anticipating its fall. Only it isn’t a well regarded piece of architectural engineering. It’s a 300-lb black man parading around a dance floor in a too-small-not-to-hurt outfit….anticipating his fall.
That’s all for now; with all the calories to be consumed this week, rest assured I’ll be checking in often.